Advice to Love By

Sorry for the delay my Hallmark pals. I am travelling this week so I had trouble getting to this one “on time.” I am also trying to charge up for THIS WEEKEND. I cannot believe it’s here. Granted, Christmas is still two months away but every store in town seems to be taking its cues from Hallmark. So, despite living in the PNW and still wearing flip flops on many occasions, it is beginning to look a lot like Christmas. But in Hallmarkland, it’s still “fall” so let’s get after this movie okay?

Our lead, Kendall is giving an interview on a talk show. The interviewer things she’s “hacked romance.” And she’s written a couple books on dating. She has a data driven approach to dating I think? Seems kind of like matchmaking. Like the kind you pay a lot of money for and they run you through their algorithm. Yes, her approach is facts over feelings. If the data supports it, anyone can be successful in a relationship without work or feelings to get in the way! She does some straight up match making in the interview with a couple of audience members. Wow. Can’t wait to see how that plays out. Then she gets asked about a “feelings based” love columnist. He’s an idiot, of course and his approach should NOT BE CONFUSED WITH ACTUAL DATING SCIENCE YOU GUYS.

Dr. Lovestruck watches the interview and obviously disagrees and wonders what the science of love even means. I wonder that myself. He wants to meet up with Kendall and set her straight. Nathan, Dr. Lovestruck’s Christian name, helps his pal Larry level up his anniversary weekend. I actually HATE his suggestion because it’s super cliché and corny but maybe this guy’s wife will like it. We’ll see.

Kendall debriefs with her friend or assistant, Ella or whatever. Ella would like to be set up with a random stranger in a television audience too too. Oh she is the editor. Forgive me Ella! Kendall needs to churn out another book. Didn’t she just finish one? But she is struggling to come up with another good idea.

Back at home, Kendall has ZERO book ideas. She reads some articles by Dr. Lovestruck for inspiration. His latest article is about “grand romantic gestures.” Kendall and I are on the same page here that they are dumb and can be meaningless. Kendall’s sister, Joy, is over and she is directing this rant to her. Her sister has a new boyfriend and asks Kendall to go easy on him when they meet. She is not sure she can. I’m not sure I can either. We’ll see about TYLER when we meet him, OKAY?

Meanwhile, Nate dog is in his boss’s office. His boss asks him to do an author profile on…KENDALL. He is not allowed to tell Kendall that he’s Dr. Lovestruck because it is supposed to be a secret. I wonder if that will be an issue later.

Kendall is at “Book Salad” for her book signing. The store owner, Grant is pretty dang cute. Ella is VERY interested. Oh, wait no she wanted Kendall to date him. Maybe Ella should give him a shot. Nathan shows up to listen too. Kendall reads from her book. We are all bored to tears. Nathan waits until the very end to get his book signed. He asks her to sign her book for “Larry.” He starts asking her about her book and she seems a little defensive. Kendall says her books are based on statistics. And he asks like where her idea came from. She doesn’t know! Ella recognizes Nathan as a reporter for the magazine. And then he says he wants to interview her for the magazine. So now the cat is a little out of the bag.

Grant the wet sandwich book store owner (he really is, bless his heart) comes by and Ella has to try and contain her drool. Kendall doesn’t like that Nathan called her “entertaining.” She thinks it’s condescending. Because IT IS.

Kendall stares at her blank white board at home again. No new book ideas! She decides to google Nathan instead and read some of the interviews he’s done.

The next day, they meet for coffee and Nathan somehow knows her order. That is so creepy. Like how would he possibly know that? Then, this cute older couple approaches them and thanks Nathan for their coffee. Kendall calls him “theatrical and thinks its all an act. I mean, now that she mentions it, it might be? But also, Kendall is a skeptical robot. And Nathan is a too in his feelings hippie, apparently. (Her words.)

The next day, Kendall has tons of new inspiration for her new book. She is going to experiment on herself this time! OH Kendall is going to “How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days” poor Nathan.

The next day, Nathan is getting coffee at work and gazing into space. Poor Larry updates him about his anniversary weekend. It was a disaster from top to bottom. His wife was allergic to the flowers (how would he not know that?) and their dinner got rained out. But luckily, Larry and his wife turn out to be good sports and said they ended up laughing it off and having a great time. Nathan seems overeager to get to know Kendall. Larry turns into Mrs. Potts and starts singing “There may be something there that wasn’t there before.”

Joy creeps up on Kendall at her house while she sketches out her mathematical equation/compatibility test to figure out how to make a relationship successful. She wants to see where things might come together or fall apart. It is a crazy Hallmark situation of course, but it is actually kind of interesting. I am here for it, for now.

That night, Kendall has dinner with her sister Joy and the boyfriend Tyler. They seem cute together. Kendall tries to get to know Tyler. He seems really nice. They say their relationship was “love at first sight.” But Kendall is like, girl no that’s not possible and can’t let it go. She explains that you get signs from your neuroreceptors, not your heart. BUT IT’S ALL IN YOUR BRAIN GUYS. Even your “heart feelings” are in your brain. Doesn’t anyone understand that? Your heart doesn’t actually feel feelings. Kendall essentially receives two hard eyerolls from Joy and Tyler in response.

Anyway, Kendall is wearing a fabulous pink suit for like a date/research thing with Nathan. Everyone is wearing jackets but it’s pretty green outside. So like is it fall? Is it early spring? Nathan’s jacket is suede. Is that a clue?

Both parties think they can make this about work instead of a relationship. I don’t think that’s going to work out very well!! Nathan gets a beautiful bouquet for Kendall, explaining to Larry that the only reason his parents are still married is because his dad buys his mom flowers once a month. Boy that’s pretty dark, Nathan.

Kendall heads back to Book Salad. Are we committed to that name? She is picking up some books. Poor wet sandwich Grant strolls by and talks about her personalizing books for sale. Oh Grant. Bless your heart. He wants some advice. Oh no. Is he talking about being interested in her? I can’t tell. It MIGHT BE ELLA. I hope so. I feel so uncomfortable. She tells him not to do anything and tells him to let her come to him. Oh what if he’s talking about Ella. Oh I hope this works out. I CAN’T TAKE THE SUSPENSE.

Kendall and Nathan run into each other and he hands her the flowers. He starts talking about the flowers and she straight up asks who writes the Dr. Lovestruck column. She just goes for it.  Wait, what is the vibe of his farmer’s market. DO I SEE A HINT OF FALL DÉCOR? A sad little pumpkin on a shelf? A solitary leaf garland from Michael’s? I’ll take it. Oh and a blurry fall colored mantle in the background. Then they hear bells. UH OH. Like what Ella says happens when you fall in love or something?

Then they have a lovely picnic lunch in the park. She says a bad break up got her into this biz. They talk about the different feelings in a new relationship and she turns into a robot. He thinks she’s too serious. SHE IS. And he is too distracted. I don’t know about that. She is just a straight up robot. Nathan suggests they do something fun that afternoon. They do more talking and getting to know each other. She guesses some core components of his personality pretty accurately. They go to a random outdoor drop in judo class. Just throw on some used gis and just get after it. They are literally on a clothing rack outside. Where did they change into them though? Gross. Kendall went to “judo camp” every summer. Anyway, they’re having a good time.

Kendall crosses some things off her white board in the relationship progression. Things are going according to plan I think?

The ladies at the publishing company are stoked about Kendall’s upcoming book. Then we find out that ELLA is dating someone. But it’s very new so she doesn’t want to talk about it. Where is poor Grant in the middle of this?

Nathan and Kendall’s next date is a ropes course or something? Kill me. No thank you. No book is worth doing a ropes court high above the ground. My palms are literally sweating as I watch this scene. She’s just sitting on a swinging board like 50 feet above the ground. I can’t. I can’t even watch them do this. No. Nathan is going to keep going? No Nathan! Think of your family. I’m dying.

They have a nice chat RIGHT NEXT TO A MOVING TRAIN. They say they are enjoying getting to know each other and he says he is glad she has nothing to hide. I think? It’s not like they can actually hear what the other is saying. So then Kendall immediately spills the beans on her book idea. It seemed like he was about to spill the Dr. Lovestruck secret too but he doesn’t. He wants to pick his own name in the book. I think they land on “Spike.” Are we sure about that one? And then we don’t circle back to Dr. Lovestruck. Hmm. Okay That probably won’t be a problem later.

Kendall chats with Joy while she does some painting right in the middle of her living room. Kendall shares that she’s bringing Nathan to the art show. Joy says there is something to gut feelings. Kendall says you can’t quantify that. Fair.

Nathan participates in a meeting and his boss calls poor Larry “Levi.” I must admit I found his name equally forgettable and didn’t realize it was Larry until AFTER this scene. Nathan’s boss loves his first draft of the Kendall profile. Nathan wants to give Kendall a heads up about Dr. Lovestruck before it goes to print. OOH and now we hear that Nathan might be up for a promotion. It’s a little late to bring up a promotion opportunity isn’t it? At least it isn’t “Junior Digital Print Editor” or whatever. After some chit chat with Larry, Nathan realizes he and Kendall are dating. KEEP UP GIRL. Then he basically talks himself out of telling Kendall that he’s Dr. Lovestruck.

Later, Kendall and Nate walk and eat seafood from a cardboard baskets.

That night, Kendall has dinner over at Joy’s house. Tyler is making vegan chili. Oof that bums me out. Tyler read Kendall’s book and thinks she’s got a point. Oh, Joy is the vegan and Tyler is trying his best. Okay that makes sense.

The next day? Kendall and Ella shop in an abandoned warehouse. Ella spills that she’s bringing a date to some Gala they’re all going to. I missed what this was. Is it for the magazine? No, Nathan is covering the Gala for the magazine. I have no idea what the Gala is for but it’s Hallmark so of course there’s a Gala.

Later, Nate dog is committed to that suede jacket and takes Kendall wine tasting. This extra playing the wine pourer is doing THE MOST. Just taking every opportunity. Kendall looks like she has a filter permanently applied to her face. I don’t hate it but she’s matte and everyone else is not. So it is noticeable to say the least. While Kendall and Nate chat about making relationships work, the couple Kendall set up in that television interview show up to tell her they’ve really hit it off! They’re like a total couple now. It’s only been a few weeks. Now it’s time for Kendall to make her choice on which wine she is going to buy? I think? Anyway Nate dog knew which one she’d pick. After the wine tasting, Nate takes her outside for a full fledged romantic dinner. Oh cute. He takes her hand.

Larry finds Nathan frozen in place at work the next day. He obviously really likes Kendall. Nate’s boss really likes the Dr. Lovestruck column. He doesn’t read them because he’s an expert on romance after being married three times. I didn’t notice he was a creep earlier.

That night is Joy’s art show. Things are going really well. Tyler is very supportive. Then Nate arrives. Oh it’s time to meet Joy. He grabs her hand! Later that night? Nate works on a new article for Dr. Lovestruck about meeting the family of the person you’re dating. Meanwhile, Kendall is on to step 4 in her relationship formula. These two crazy kids might just make it!

The next morning, Nate wants to chat with his boss. He mentions to Nate that he will be considered for the “Features Editor” opening. Oh! He like has the job already. And he didn’t even need to plan the company Christmas party to do it. Very exciting. And now someone else will take over as Dr. Lovestruck. I still can’t imagine that Kendall won’t be irrationally angry when she learns the truth. We’ve got about 15 minutes of movie left so anything is possible. Nathan texts Kendall and asks her to meet. At the restaurant, she orders an iced tea and they’re sitting outside. That’s a summer drink and they’re in Seattle. Okay and then somehow instead of telling her the truth about Dr. Lovestruck all kinds of things distract them. First, she learns about his promotion! Then she sees Ella and Grant together!

So I’m glad Grant ignored her advice or did he? Oh good they’re joining Nate and Kendall. So no discussion about the Dr. Lovestruck business. But we still have time. Not much. He chickens out of telling her after lunch. She invites him out to dinner.

Kendall gets the whole book proposal done and shares it with Ella. The title is “how it worked for me…” which means that she and Nathan are going to be in a real dating relationship. Ella is very happy for Kendall and suggests Nathan review Kendall’s book proposal. So she heads over there to show him. Is Nate finally going to fess up?

She sits down at Nathan’s kitchen table and sees a mark up of the Dr. Lovestruck column and a draft article up on his computer. Do nobody’s computer screens go to sleep in Hallmark movies? She is unsurprisingly very huffy. She’s like, hey I told you what I was doing why didn’t you extend me the same courtesy? He’s like girl chill out. But she’s got to be mad otherwise the movie would end too early.

So Kendall storms on home and tries half heartedly to erase her work on the white board. But she’s left the writing on too long so it doesn’t erase very well. So that’s kind of futile. Kind of like when you try to slam a door but your shirt gets caught on the handle. Kind of ruins the whole dramatic moment.

The next day, Kendall is still huffy. Joy arrives to save the day. Oh Joy doesn’t know what happened. Kendall says she has to throw the whole book out now but Joy is like no you love him. And just write the book so you can pay your bills. Why does only Kendall have like a filter effect on her face?

So tonight is a book Gala but what is the purpose? In fact it’s night 1 of a book gala. I DON’T GET IT. Kendall is wearing a super cute pink dress. Upon arrival, she immediately starts looking around for Nathan. She walks up the stairs and misses Nathan arriving. Nathan then enlists Larry’s help for a grand romantic gesture which as we all know, is on brand for him. The Gala kicks off with a Q&A with Kendall. They ask for a preview from her newest book. Kendall punts on some of the tougher questions by encouraging people to read the book. Like obviously. She is just barely getting started. Who reviewed this questions beforehand? Nathan immediately asks a question. Is anyone surprised that it’s a speech and not a question? WHOA he loves her? Well, luckily for all of us, everything is forgiven. He also likes the new book proposal. They kiss and then dance the night away.

Well, that was pretty cute. It was very silly but do I even need to say that at this point? They’re all silly. I liked these two. There was a little hint of fall and it was a unique story line. So yeah! Worth a watch! It was a nice way to close out the “Fall Harvest” series. What did you think?

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